So, my life has been pretty hectic lately. A big part is just trying to survive school and minor fits of depression. I lost my job, but I'm kind of okay with that. Lack of money, but oh well. In general, I've just been overwhelmed by life (and Yaoi Con franticness didn't help).

But there is hope!

So a few days ago I was on the bus heading home. And beside me there was a religious woman (Christian specifically). She started up a conversation with the girl across from her and they talked the Jesus talk. Whatever, good for them, she found a kindred soul. A couple of stops later the second girl got off and the woman turned her sights on me. I tried to be nice, I didn't want to insult her faith. I let her know I was Buddhist, politely told her it wasn't for me, but she would let up. I took to ignoring her and she still wouldn't stop! Annoyed, I turned to her and gave the argument that turned me off of Christianity long before I found Buddhism. If God would deny access to heaven to 70% of the world simply because they happen to believe something different, then I don't want to go to that heaven.

She kept trying, it took several more stops before she gave up. However, after a moment she turned to the woman on her other side, whos immediate response was "I'm a witch, I've been a witch for a very long time. My gods are much older and more powerful than yours, so keep your proselytizing to yourself." The religious woman still wouldn't stop and the witch yelled at her that others have beliefs too. It was all quite entertaining, actually.

Anyway, the nice witch and I got off at the same stop. As we left the bus, I turned to her and said "Goddess bless" to which she bowed and gave a kind "Namaste" in return.

Maybe there's hope for the world after all.

*deep sigh* My life is made of so much suck right now, it's ridiculous.

So let's start with the suck of school. It's craptastic, that is all. I'm getting pissed at my inability to fix it, but that's a good thing, because it means I probably will fix it now, that's how I got over my aracnaphobia after all ^_^

Des is back at the house, has been for a while now. The amazing crap in her life just boggles my mind, but not quite as much as the fact that she keeps going back to the bastard and putting up with his shit. Seriously, the fucker is above and beyond asshole, cheating, lying, blaming, badmouthing, I would do a lot more than dump his sorry ass.

But anyway, Des is back at the house. For anyone in the circle of friends that actually knows her, this should tell you where my stress levels are right now. I tend to avoid talking bad of people that are into the online thing...but I don't think she knows my LJ, so I'm gonna be a little more free. She needs to get a fucking clue! She needs to grow up and learn to take care of herself. Knowing that this situation is far from permanent, she's done nothing to try and find another place to live. She's going back to Hal's and staying with the fucker when his new fuck toy isn't there, and she's still doing the cleaning and organizing and bill paying - and she wonders why he isn't speeding the process to get her out of there? I know I'm only getting half the story, and I know it's Des's somewhat altered view of reality...but even taking all that into account, Hal is doing some seriously messed up shit. And she's putting up with it still!

There is an episode of CSI that I always kind of liked. It's this cheerleader who kills a guy that really had it coming. But when they go to her house, they see an empty fridge and a picture of a fat girl they assume is her roommate. Actually it's the cheerleader, and she keeps the photo to remind her and get her to thin down at any cost. So, i want to get a picture of Des, and one of my Dad, and others in my life that have failed. I need to put them somewhere prominant as a reminder - this is what you will be if you don't pull your crap together.

Tee hee~ I haz a new laptop. It's an Asus EeePC and it's tiny ^_^

Only cost me $250 plus handling and such. I think I'm planning to get one for 1st my dad and 2nd my boy. I'd give one of them my old laptop, but it doesn't really work. It's a little slow, otherwise fine in terms of running, but the battery is fried and the power cable is messed up AGAIN. All in all, I spent too much money on that one, had to replace the screen even, but it was a good machine for 3 or more years. I hope this new one lasts as long (preferably longer).

Bullshit is really a great show ^_^ and youtube is a great thing!

I'm back, hello all. And I'm using the journal for what it is today - a journal. Saa, it's just been a rough time lately. I had an episode at work the other night, I was ready to curse out every guest and run to the back room and just refuse to get out. And I've been taking my meds, too! thankfully, it passed, but it was pretty bad. The night before I hit a real low while I was reading. I was insanely depressed and I'm not sure why, I was thinking about cutting, and I'm not sure if I was just thinking about it or if I was thinking about actually doing it. Thankfully, this, too passed. I'm too smart/aware to actually hurt myself, a sign I'm decently healthy still.

I'm still feeling kinda bleh, but not really depressed anymore. Just bleh, just don't wanna go to work. My school is made of fail as well, but, there's not much I can do about it until Fall starts. x__x

oh my god, I hate fevers so much.

I honestly don't know how G-chan does it, when he gets a fever he just cuddles up in a blanket and rides out the gnarly dreams. Not me, can't do it. Now, most illnesses, I'm violently opposed to taking medication - for various reasons from building a tolerance to suppressing my natural immune system. Not fevers, I will take anything to knock that crap OUT.

I got hit and hit hard. I called in sick to work, two days in a row, and I was actually sick. Chugging nyquil knockoff and swallowing tylenol every 6 hours, I spent both days almost entirely asleep. I still have the fever, too, but it's under control now, which is good, since I'm being silly and helping at Anime Expo ^_^ Like I'd let a silly fever stop me from that, right?

Oh, it's been so long since I've been here, I miss it so much~

Well, as some of you may know already, I struggle with depression. And lately, as in the past several months, it got really bad again. I'm back on medication now and it seems to be going well. I have almost zero free time with work now that summer's starting, lots of people come to Disney in the summer. And on top of that I'm struggling with school again, I'm pissed off at how much I'm failing, so I think I might do it this time.

Oh, I've missed reading so much! I got a membership to the library, I started reading one of my scholarly books, and I'm in the middle of "One flew over the Cuckoo's nest" right now. I haven't read at all in months, and nothing other than manga in even longer. Now, there's nothing wrong with manga, I still like reading it, but I didn't realize how much I missed just reading novels. I think that is going to help me a whole lot more than anything else.

Well, this is just a quick update, not much else to report. But I hope to be coming back and giving you more soon. I love you all! And Happy Birthday Megu! And Loki! And Mems, and Tenkuu, and everyone else I missed!

Hello everyone that actually pays attention to me.

I thought I would give you all an update and proove to you all that I'm not dead. Let's see, when was the last time I posted something? (goes to look) Mid October, wow, even longer than I thought. Okay, well, first things first - to all those that were/are reading "The Importance of Being Friends" I'm very sorry. It got abandoned for reasons that will follow, and won't be picked up again for a while. I do intend to finish it, it's just gonna take time to fill in the missing parts and get it up.

( Okay, let's see, Oct )

( Nov )

( Dec )

( Jan )

( Feb )

Wow. That was a lot. Well, in any case, you can see why I've been away. I've been sick a couple times somewhere in all that mess, too. Sucks super big time. I'm not sure I'll really be back soon, either, but it does seem to be getting slowly better. I hope everyone is having some better times than I am. Bye everyone, hopefully I'll be talking to you all again soon.

The Prompt – "How about instead of a request, your prompt is THIS PIC I saw over at HOOPSNAKE. i.e. set before the Kyuubi attack a pre-genin Iruka makes friends with Rin & Obitio... but not so much with Kakashi. You can take that in any direction you like but I hope it'll be something fun and bratty :) -konkira" –Saa, this has been a long time coming! I really am sorry about the horrendous wait, I’ve had the idea for a while, but hadn’t had time to get it typed up.

As an apology for taking so long, this was going to be the main request followed by a follow-up chapter. Then I started writing and it’s…at least 4 chapters long, not totally sure yet. So anyway, it’s obvious I liked the idea ^_^ I hope you all like it, too.

Author: Lily Kalanoa
Story: The Importance of Being Friends (gods, that’s a pretty random reference)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my laptop, which put me into significant debt. All characters and series belong to their respective creators, I just like to torture them, heh heh.
Warnings: Angst later, death but it’s all canon, spoilers for Kakashi’s past

( I haz a question )

( Here’s the story )

Hey all! ^_^ I doubt...scratch that, I know not many people pay attention to my journal except when I post stuff and tell the comms. But just in case anyone is curious - I'm not dead.

I've still got a couple request stories that need to be posted, but I started having some computer/internet problems. So my priority became "fix Compie". I have since completely wiped my hard drive, restoring it to factory basic settings (that means deleting EVERYTHING), deleting all the things that come from the factory that I don't want, and am now in the process of loading all my files BACK onto Compie. In any case, I'm not dead, and more stories are forthcoming. I'm also looking forward to posting Slayers fics here - now there's a fandom that is in serious need of revival.

With none of my own files on Compie, it's kind of nice to come here where my LJ settings and icons are still saved and sound ^_^

Mwahaha! This was just random fun ^__^ Love the prompt~"I'd like a little drabble about how Genma, Izumo, and Kotetsu decide that they just can't take it anymore and have to see Kakashi's face. So they become TEAM DISTRACTOIN and somehow get Iruka to leave his belongings unattended in the Mission's room to try and find out if he has any pics of his boyfriend maskless on his phone (or naughty pics-lolpenis!!). ;D I dunno...I think it'd be a funny story xD *shot*also, they could start texting kakashi during that whole mess...o_o; okay I'll stop now. XD –beasiesgal"

Team Distraction by Lily Kalanoa
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my laptop, which put me into significant debt. All characters and series belong to their respective creators, I just like to torture them, heh heh.

And this is the link if anyone else out there wants a request.

( Let the Distraction begin! )

So, yeah, this is why I don’t like posting stories when I’m not totally done writing them. It’s a rule of mine, yet somehow, every year or so, I forget why I hate it so much. This story was mostly finished (done in my head, just not written out) so I figure, sure, I can keep up with it. Now, if I had done the math, I would have known that this would put chapter 4 right before school started, with one more chapter to go. *huge sigh*

Well school delays aside, life sort of intervined, but I’ve got it done now. Here’s to deathjunke for the great prompt. Also also! I got arts for it ^_^ It’s not Naruto, but it’s still awesome. Here if anyone wants to see it. Sorry for the wait, but I hope you’ve liked it!

And at last, with this story I never gave the link for a request. Although if you make a request, you probably won’t get anything quite this epic, still. Okay, enough babbling already, on with the finale!

Approval by Lily Kalanoa
Genre: Naruto – romance/humor/drama
Rating: R

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4

( Chapter 5 )

Well, when I first started thinking about this request, my mind made whisperings of a fluffy bit of humor. Well, just more proof that I’m a little bubbling angst-whore, it’s become more serious than I expected. I like it still, though, and I hope you all like it, too. Last chapter will go up later this week. Also, I haven’t been responding to my reviewers, but I appreciate all the support! Thank you all for your kind words, and thank deathjunke for the plotbunny ^__^

Approval by Lily Kalanoa
Genre: Naruto – romance/humor/drama
Rating: R

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3

( Chapter 4 )

Just a short hello. I'm stealing internet during game while I should be paying attention. Enjoy chapter 3, it's starting to get interesting!

Approval by Lily Kalanoa
Genre: Naruto – romance/humor/drama
Rating: R eventually

Chapter 1
Chapter 2

( Chapter 3 )

...my mind blanks as to who titles their journals that way, but it is extremely fitting for my current mind-set/mood. I mentioned on my last story post that this has been the hectic week from hell. Well since posting that it has graduated to heart-attack and stroke inducing, let's everybody do our damnest to kill the fortune writer, full blown cursing hell.

Okay, the logical thing would be to start at the beginning, but instead we are going to start last night. This would be the panic attack part. To start with, me and Loki went job hunting, which is all sorts of stressful anyway. And we had arguable success (read, I hate it and don't know yet if anywhere will hire me). So we go through all that and I am extremely stressed and ended up taking a nap while everyone else watched TV. When I woke up, I took my laptop and did laptop things. There was a strange sort of clicking noise, but I didn't see anything wrong. Not long after, Loki took the compie to check something and it clicked again and I asked what it was. Between the two of us looking, we notice SMOKE freaking POURING from the fan port. I started shaking and cursing and generally...even thinking about it freaks me out. So we let the compie rest for nearly 24 hours and opened it up (stressful in itself). As it turns out, Compie overheated so much that the dust around the fan started to burn. Clearly something is off with the fan, but as of right now, it's okay.

SIGH. The hectic-ness leading up to this was all cleaning and financial and school. You know, the usual complaints. We've decided to rent rooms to try and bring in extra cash. The house is officially off the market, do to lousy offers and general dissinterest, and I put up flyers yesterday. However, before we even had the flyers thought up, we got a renter in the form of Loki-kun. It's all very complicated and not for me to say, but the end result is that he's here now. All last week I was cleaning and moving into the sewing room...which is almost big enough for me, all my stuff, and all the sewing stuff. It means we can rent both of the bigger rooms, though, so I think it's worth it.

And there it is, my attack of a life. I'm still kinda worked up from it all, but there is good news, too. In the middle of writing this there was a phone call from possible renters. So, good news on that front, at least. *shiver* Well, off to back up my entire freaking hard drive now, bye >_

Ugh, this has been the week from hectic hell. I may have to actually be social and post something not fic related later *gaspu!* But for now, let's just get this up for you all. I was supposed to be posting ch3 already, sorry for the delay >_< Oh, and Happy Olympics!!

Approval by Lily Kalanoa
Genre: Naruto – romance/humor/drama
Rating: R eventually

Chapter 1

( Chapter 2 )

Approval by Lily Kalanoa
The Prompt "a kakashi/iruka with an angry/disapproving/jealous Naruto who will do just about anyting to make them stop seeing eachother -deathjunke" Naruto returns from training with Jiraiya and all he wants to do is go back to his friends and back to how things were. Unfortunately after more than a year away, not everything is how he remembers.

Genre: Naruto – romance/humor/drama
Rating: R eventually
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my laptop, which put me into significant debt. All characters and series belong to their respective creators, I just like to torture them, heh heh.
Warnings: Yaoi, Homophobia, some minor prejudice and stupidity on that level
Spoilers: There's going to be a few for events before the time skip, not many though. Mostly just what Naruto got up to, and I'm making a lot of that up.

( Chapter 1 )

The Prompt - "Hmmm... Kakashi returned to Iruka injured (not fatal), but he refused to go to hospital. So Iruka had to take care of him. Basically waffiness and cuddling happens. XD Sorry if this is something you had done, but I like it when Iruka and Kakashi showed that they love each other by doing something small, or insignificant but important nonetheless to each other.-xkuma_chanx" I've never done anything exactly like this, but I would do it for you anyway ^_^ I liked this one, hope you do too.

Author: Lily Kalanoa
Story: Coming Home
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my laptop, which put me into significant debt. All characters and series belong to their respective creators, I just like to torture them, heh heh.

And this is the link if anyone else out there wants a request.

( Adorable stubborness follows )

The Prompt - "I would love to see some possessive/jealous Iruka. I think he really is sexy like that ^^. I like irukaxkakashi, it's less usual. -pangasius" Well I agree, pangasius sweetie. Have some dom!Iruka . . . sorta anyway . . .

Author: Lily Kalanoa
Story: Possession
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my laptop, which put me into significant debt. All characters and series belong to their respective creators, I just like to torture them, heh heh.

And this is the link if anyone else out there wants a request. I'm goin slower now, but I'm still doing them all~ ^_^

( Possession )